


Function

by Tortellini



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Bisexual Remus Lupin, Crack, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gen, Humor, Inspired By Tumblr, Lesbian Marlene McKinnon, Male Friendship, Male-Female Friendship, Minor Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, POV Remus Lupin, Past Marlene McKinnon/Sirius Black - Freeform, Wordcount: 500-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:02:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23338075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tortellini/pseuds/Tortellini
Summary: Remus Lupin is by far the glue that holds his weird little friend group together. And you know what? Even if he says he minds, he doesn't. At all.Oneshot
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Remus Lupin & James Potter, Remus Lupin & Marlene McKinnon, Remus Lupin & Peter Pettigrew, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 34





	Function

"You know, Mars," Remus Lupin said to his friend Marlene as the two of them were studying. Well, he was more studying than her, that was for sure. "The others would really die without me. They wouldn't even be able to function."

"What? You're so making that up--"

"No." Remus cocked an eyebrow. He really wasn't, that was the side thing. "You have no idea."

She frowned. 

"Take Peter for example..."

_Peter Pettigrew was walking down the stairs of the Gryffindor dormitory. And then something happened. He wasn't entirely sure what, but before he knew it he'd find stepped on a stair wrong and was almost sliding down the stairs--_

_Luckily Remus Lupin was walking into the Common Room and he just happened to catch him. Or, break his fall more like._

_Pete got to his feet with a small grin and reached down to help his friend up. "Hey, thanks Moony!"_

_Remus winced. "...don't mention it._

"Or James."

_Sometime later James Potter was sitting out by the lake with his longtime crush, Lily Evans. One of his best friends, Remus Lupin, was sitting with him too. Totally not cockblocking or anything._

_"It’s a beautiful night." James smirked slightly. "Do you know what’s even more beautiful?"_

_Lily gave him a look. "...me. How original."_

_He looked like he wasn't expecting that. His face was in fact pretty blank. Remus sighed._

_"No, this bouquet of flowers James was just about to give you."_

_Lily blushed. James looked at him gratefully. He'd just saved his ass too._

"Or even Sirius Black--"

"Even?" Marlene smirked slightly. "I went out with him for like, two weeks before I realized I was a dyke. I know how much of a drama queen he is, Lupin."

Remus nodded. "Fair."

_Sirius Black was having a breakdown. He really did look like he was about to cry or something. He was trying to put his eyeliner on and it wasn't working--god, how anyone thought he was straight in the first place was ridiculous._

_"This is bullshit! It's not straight!"_

_Remus looked up. "Nothing is straight about you, it seems, Pads."_ _But then he saw the look on his face and he softened slightly. "Come here and let me do it for you?"_

_Sirius complied. His hair was in a messy little bun--god, it was really long now, and it looked good--and he crouched down so Remus didn't have to stand up. Remus put a hand on his cheek--but just to steady him, of course, nothing else._

_"...I'd be lost without you, Moonbeam," Sirius murmured._

_Remus smiled. "Yeah. You would be." And he didn't even mind._

"So you see?" Remus finished up. "They really would be lost without me. Ridiculous. I'm practically like the mom or something." Even though he could be just as irresponsible as them when it came down to it too. 

"And you love it." Marlene said. 

"...yeah, it's like crack to me."

"Knew it."


End file.
